What you are about to see may disturb you.


I am an American married to an Australian.

We have our differences.

For example, his people preference inappropriately short-shorts on men, sport games that take 5 days to complete, and inefficient workplace processes. (Generally speaking.)

My people preference imperialism, real freaking hot dogs, and main roads that go over 40mph. (Generally speaking.)

This weekend my husband presented me with a "snack" that he made while we watched a movie. It consisted of crackers (which he called biscuits which is why I was utterly confused when I saw the final product) covered with a layer of butter, Vegemite and topped with either cheese or a slice of pickle.

I had been suffering through a bout of gastro-intestinal disturbance all weekend and I didn't want to eat ANYTHING, but by this point in my 3-day illness I momentarily lost my dignity and thought , "who doesn't eat pickles with butter and vegemite?"

After my husband asked what gherkins were.... which lead me to wonder why he had BOUGHT them in the first place if he didn't know what they were, and why he thought they would go well with Vegemite, I thought nothing more of the incident.


The following sight, however, after almost 2 years of marriage and constant lectures on what we do (ketchup and bbq sauce) and do not (my gourmet chocolate) put in the fridge, horrified me.



Yes, you might see the bottle of opened gherkins. Nice and toasty on the pantry shelf in between a box of bread crumbs and vinegar.

And I had wondered why the pickles weren't as crisp and chilly as they usually are when we had our little snack...


Comments

suzinoz said…
That is disturbing. Very disturbing. Every time we visit my inlaws for a BBQ, I have to retrieve the 'sauce' (ketchup) from their pantry for my kids. I always mistakenly look in the fridge first because that's where bottles that read, "Refrigerate after opening" belong right? Only in some circles apparently. =)
A Free Man said…
Chocolate in the fridge is a good way to ruin perfectly good chocolate. But I do like games that take 5 days to resolve.
Daniela said…
russell enjoys the weirdest things. did he not read that ur supposed to refrigerate it? i always refrigerate stuff - even if u dont have to - like syrup.

why have u not been feeling good? did u get checked out? i hope you feel better soon....

did you lose any weight from not eating??? haha just kidding....
Arizaphale said…
IT is my belief that Tomato Sauce has so many e numbers and preservatives in it that it would survive, open, in the Gobi desert during a sandstorm. Pickles however definitely need refrigeration! Don't blame his Aussie-ness....blame his male-ness.....

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